Martina, in all the examples you have given, throw the man in jail!
For sure, without some kind of societal punishment, there would be a lot more men openly abusing women in various ways.
True it is that sexual assaults do happen outside of sexual charges environments. A woman can be raped in a pastor’s office or the stock room of a workplace.
As you can see, I’ve been having some discussion with Leslie on this matter. For sure, I am not on the “politically correct” side of this debate, and some people would prefer I just shut up. But until society fully discusses this matter, we are not likely to find effective solution.
I have realized that my position is not fully based on facts. It would be interesting to find out the percentage of sexual assaults that result from environments that have a lot of alcohol (which cause a loss of good judgement from both sides) and/or are sexually charged charged (like a night club known for bringing promiscuous players together). Maybe 70%? maybe 25%? I don’t know.
But I think it’s safe to say that staying away from these environments reduces the chance of a sexual assault.
It’s like saying not taking up tobacco reduces the chance of getting cancer later in life.
It’s like saying to cross streets at crosswalks reduces the chance for pedestrians getting hit by a car.
It’s like saying staying away from certain areas of a city because the gangs don’t like strangers and have their own rules.
In all these three scenarios, many people make a wise choice to minimize their life risk.
But for some reason, I can’t say that women should avoid environments that increase the possibility of sexual assault in their lives.
And just to show both sides of the debate, men too should avoid situations that can get them on the wrong side of this metoo movement.
In my response to Leslie, I mentioned a recent situation where, to complete an office task, I would have had to get into the bubble of a new female worker — and I quickly analyzed how that could be interpreted in the wrong way. Rather than risk that “bubble encounter”, I just waited until the encounter was no longer there. It was not a big effort in my part. But I was more conscious of dynamics because of metoo.
And likewise, a male player with a great success rate with the ladies is, every once in a while, not going to read the signals very well. In these cases, she could call out sexual assault. Regardless of whether she is justified or not, the player has to deal with a lot of legal problems defending himself. My advice to him: stay out of singles bars and get a less risky hobby. If he continues his promiscuous ways, I cannot feel sorry for him the next time he is called for assault.
I hope all this explains my position better.